The Secret to Being a Lady
by rainkisser
Summary: Sara is sent to save a poor prince from his way messed up mama. How will her knowledge help her mission? WELL I AIN'T GONNA TELL YOU OR THERE AIN'T NO POINT IN YOU READING IT! (smiles sweetly) A Princess and the Pea retelling.
1. The Beginning

My name is Lady Sara Cunnings and I am a lady through and through. I donot have the talent to sword fight, nor the desire to wear male clothes. I do not ride a horse any other way but side saddle, nor do I read excessively. I am not one of those girls who decides that being a lady is simply outrageous. I have noticed that being a girl with any of the odd quirks listed above is becoming a fashionable thing. I, how ever, do not follow this trend. I am proud to be a lady, proud to hold myself with dignity to the custom that has been held for generations.

My father is a Duke and my mother was a Marquess's daughter. My family did not have any large tragedies that we had to pull through, my father is a hardworking man who keeps the family aloft. All in all, I come from a respected and well-rounded family.

Not only am I a lady through status, but I am taught in all the ladylike affairs. Through my years, I have been taught how to dance, sit, curtsy, walk, talk, and stand (though most ladies do not stand longer than is needed) like a lady. I have learned proper table manners and how to sew. I have also been taught reading, writing, and arithmetic along with the basic languages which include german, french, and latin, though in truth I have only absorbed french as it is the only one I have needed to use.

Not only this, but I have learned one of the most basic skills a lady ever learns, how to gossip. Though I have taken no class on this, I have become an expert in gossip, being able to make small talk, gain a person's confidence, and learn some of their deepest secrets, along with ones they have acquired from others, in a single conversation.

In general, I find it is wonderful to be a lady. Being ladylike is an "art form", as my mother puts it. It takes practice and talent. I think it is something that all women should learn to become, just as men should learn to be gentlemen.

Do not mistake me as being pompous though. I am open to those who wish to branch out from being ladylike, have befriended many as a matter of fact. How ever, the one thing that has angered me the most is that now that so many are turning to this wilder type of woman, there seems to be the idea that all ladies are desperate, narrowminded, spoiled fools. Though I have noticed that this idea is true for many ladies today, I must disagree that _all_ ladies are like this. The practice of being a lady is one that forces you to stay composed and calm through desperate times, for if you can not, you are no true lady. It is one that forces you to be open to all people and ideas, for if you do not embrace the world, there is no reason for the world to embrace you. A lady must never demand she have something, neither does she always get what she wants, she must be able to make sacrifices for the good of her family and community. And finally, being a lady is to be wise, for if a lady does not watch her step, it could mean a scandal that will scar her family.

I have noticed that many girls who decide to call themselves 'ladies' have broken these rules. They act as if the whole world is waiting for their dishonorable selves to seize it. The reason for this, I have concluded, is that they don't know how to use what they are taught.

I know what you are thinking. How can dancing, gossip, and curtsies be of any use? Any true lady knows the true secret to that, but it is not one for me to share, it is only one for an individual to learn solely.

I am here, riding to a castle to save a prince whose mother is far too overprotecting, because I know the secret to being ladylike. There has been a mad search by the kingdom of Nossel for, as the messenger announced, "a young noblewoman who is excellently ladylike to marry prince" for about a year now and for that year I have been able to avoid such a thing.

You see, most women would throw themselves at such an offer. Who wouldn't want to marry a prince? Well, that is what most ladies thought immediately, and because of that, mobs of ladies traveled to the castle, leaving me, who wouldn't make such a spectacle as being in a desperate group, to wait for their return. Ladies upon ladies left to the castle, and each one returned of a horrified story of how they ripped they're dresses through a mass of thorns or how they dirtied they're stocking when stepping through some mud and as a result, they were immediately sent home by an attendant of the Queen. When the messenger had said, "a young noblewoman who is excellently ladylike" he had literally meant "extremely ladylike" for it appeared that the Queen was setting up tests for ladies to see how fit they were for her son. Some ladies were actually able to meet with the Queen, but found that they were sent home only moments after meeting her. It seemed that the Queen was very picky with the meaning of "ladylike".

For the first several months, the people of Nossel were fine with the Queens actions, but they soon became frantic, as the neglected kingdom began to crumble, for there prince to marry so that he could take the thrown (as law stated for the monarch to be married) and keep the kingdom in order. More messengers were being sent out to find a lady who could bare the task and save the poor prince. More and more ladies appeared to test themselves against the Queen's challenge, but each returned in dazed confusion. I had been asked several times, but my whole family, including myself, refused, not seeing any hope in attempting such an impossible task. One day, however, my family could not refuse any longer. At one of our parties, another messenger arrived and at that moment, it seemed everyone looked to me.

"You are a very clever girl," someone had said.

"Yes, you could very well do it, Lady Sara,"another had added. My family had looked at me with sad eyes, my father gave a slight nod and all I could do was nod to the crowd and listen to them cheer. Before I had left, a large party was thrown for me for good luck and a safe journey. And I left.

Now I was here, sitting in a carriage, riding through a road full of trees that led to the place where no lady stayed longer than a night. I was looking out the window, when the carriage stopped.

"Sir, what seems to be the problem?" I asked through the rectangular gap in front of me that gave me access to the driver. The driver turned back to me.

"The road is blocked here miss. I'm afraid there is no other way through," he told me. I did not just come here to have no way to the castle.

"Sir, can I have your assistance out of the carriage?" I asked, "I would like to inspect our situation further." The door soon opened and the driver helped me down. I looked forward and saw and eight foot high wall of thorns that stood tall and wide, reached far into the forest next to me. I came up to it and looked across, seeing if there was any opening. All looked hopeless until I found an odd, almost triangular opening in the wall of thorns. I turned to the driver.

"Sir, I have found a way through in which we can go by foot. Could you lead the way?" I requested. The driver looked at me, like this was a normal question. I looked up at him kindly and he soon sighed, nodded and approached the wall. He was a very tall man and the moment he crouched down to try and make his way through, he scratched his face. He stepped back and put a hand to the cut near his eye.

"Oh my! Are you all right?" I asked him, a hand to my mouth.

"Yes, just fine," he said, nodding, "I am afraid I can not make it through, and I do not think it is fit for you to attempt it either, miss. We should head back to town and you can go home to your city by next week," he offered. It was very tempting, but I couldn't give up.

"Thank you, but I think I will be just fine. If you could wait for me to send someone from the castle to you, I need to get to the castle," I told him. The driver sighed again.

"Very well, miss," he said as I approached the mass of thorns, "Do be careful though."

"I will," I replied as I stepped forward, finding that my dress, my arms, and my head fit perfectly with barely a centimeter of room to spare. I moved forward, stepping into my first test.

It was quite peculiar, walking around with thorns surrounding you, but it was easy. I found myself making a sharp turn right, my skirt barely missing the thorns that smiled at with their sharp, pointed teeth. I then turned left. It then started to become a weave. I twisted and turned and found that soon my feet were moving about on there own. I did not quite realize what I was doing until I found myself twirling and making it through an oddly curved mass of forms. It was a dance! What a wonderful first test. Most ladies would not realize the steps and would end up scratching themselves so much that they would have to turn back. My feet carried me about and I started humming out the tune. Left, right, forward, back, left, right, forward, twirl, right, twirl, left, twirl, left, right, forward, back. On and on it went. Finally I came to the last couple chords and on the ending note I stopped and found myself standing at the bottom of a road on a slightly sloped hill. At the top of the hill stood a castle, that was majestic and all, but not very welcoming. I started forward and after only a short amount of walking, I found a servant (I can tell the difference quite easily, it is all in posture and clothes) standing erect in the clothes of a serving man. I stopped and turned to him.

"Sir," I said.

"Yes, miss?"

"I am Lady Sara Cunnings, daughter of Duke Cunnings. I have come to meet with her majesty the Queen and his royal highness. How ever, I am an unexpected visitor. Would you head over to the castle and inform the Queen of my arrival please?" I asked him.

"Of course, miss," the servant said with a bow. He turned to leave, but I stopped him.

"Sir," he turned to face me, "I have also my carriage with my luggage on the other side of the wall, if you could have that retrieved I would be highly appreciative of it,"the man nodded, "Oh, and could you have some form of transportation, a carriage or a horse perhaps, sent to assist me so that I may come to the castle please? It is hardly fitting for me to arrive on foot," I added, finally. The servant gave a slight smile and clapped his hands. Out came another man with two horses. The man gave me the reins to one horse as the other servant galloped of to the castle. I probably just passed my next test. I was about to ask for assistance onto the horse when I realized a major problem.

"Excuse me, sir, but I can not ride with this saddle. May I please have a side saddle?" the man smiled and clapped his hands and out came another boy with the correct saddle. He strapped it on the saddle to the horse. Another test completed.

"May I have your assistance sir?" I asked the man who brought the horses. He nodded and boosted me up.

"Thank you," I said.

"Your welcome, miss," the man replied. I road up the hill at a slow, delicate pace and when I reached the top of the hill I found two men standing near the castle entrance. One approached me and assisted me down. When I reached the ground, I found a large puddle in front of me, blocking my way to the steps.

"Is there something to cover the puddle so I can step across it?" I asked the servants. The man who was just standing by nodded and put down his coat across the puddle. I stepped on it and across the puddle. I then turned to the coat's owner.

"Thank you very much, sir," I said, while grabbing a purse from a small pocket in my skirt, "I hope this can pay for a new one," I added, giving him a good sum of money. He smiled and clapped his hands. It was then that the castle doors opened. I sighed, having completed the test, and turned around to find a finely adorned woman and a young gentleman standing side by side. I gave a graceful low curtsy.

"Your majesty. Your Highness," I said, still in a low curtsy position.

"You may rise," I heard the cold voice of the Queen say, I looked up, waited one moments, as one should, and rose. I swear I saw the Queen give me an evil glare with her light blue eyes, but she recovered herself. Maybe the curtsy was part of the test.

"Lady Sara, is it?" the Queen asked.

"Yes, your majesty,"

"Why was I not informed of your arrival?" she questioned.

"I am terribly sorry, your majesty," I started, "But my visit was on short notice. I am sorry if I am an inconvenience to you, majesty. I hope that I may stay awhile, if you please," I added, giving a small curtsy.

"Of course," the Queen answered, "How long are you planning to stay?"

"How ever long is needed majesty,"

"Fine answer," the Queen said, "It is late you may join me and for dinner in one hour. Your luggage has been brought to your room." With this, she turned, her slightly greying blonde hair tossing along with her turn a bit, while the prince followed behind like he was on a leash. I came inside and then the doors slammed behind me.

* * *

A/N: It WILL be the Princess and the Pea! I swear it will! I just wanted to get it up, but I must say that I will probably not update for an INCREDIBLY long time, because I don't want to balance THREE stories at once (it's hard enough with two as it is!) So... yeah. If you liked it, go read my other stuff or something. If you hated it, then be glad that I am not updating fast!

**Disclaimer: I don't own the story of the Princess and the Pea, but I do own my characters, ideas, and any extra plot I am adding to this. So, don't sue me for writing a Princess and the Pea retelling (but really, who actually OWNS it?). Remember, though, that this is also my work too! I own parts of this! SO DON'T STEAL IT OR I GO GET MY LAWYER AND BE ALL ON YOUR SORRY LITTLE BEHIND!**

Much blah-ness,

Mia


	2. Ladders and Long Lasting Curtsies

"Miss," I turned to face the woman who was addressing me, she was short and thin with greying, black hair and deep brown eyes that seemed to hold many secrets, "I am to take you to your room," she said. I nodded and waited for her to lead me down one of the halls, but she just stood there.

"Is something wrong?" I asked in confusion.

"No miss," the woman responded, but despite her answer, she still stood still in the dimly illuminated hall as if she wanted something.

"Is there something you need?" I questioned.

"Just to take you to the correct room, miss," she replied. She looked like a kind enough person, but there was something, odd about her standing there. She looked like she was waiting for me to say something, to tell her something before she took me to my room. It must be another test. I thought hard on this. An idea finally reached me.

"Do you know where my room is?" I asked.

"Yes, but it is for you to tell me where it is," she said. So it was a test! This was a very odd test, but I guess it is sensible. I am here to try and marry the prince, meaning that I would become hostess of the castle and have to figure out where each person should sleep. From the outside, the castle looked like an older one, maybe from the late fourteenth century. I looked around the room. It was hard to see with so few candles or windows around, but I managed to catch onto what I needed. Right above the point of the grand entrance doorways were the finely crafted letters "J.T.". The castle was designed by Jacques Trevert, an architect who had a very large obsession with symmetry. This would mean that the guest rooms would be in the far left and right areas of the castle. Now, when it came to arranging guests, the highest ranked people would be put in the right quarters, and the lower ranks in the left, an odd tradition that was still held. As a dukes daughter, that cancels out the left quarters for me. From the left quarters, the highest of the ranks would always be put at the farthest room down the hall, with ladies on the left side of the hall and gentlemen or married couples on the right. Assuming I am the only guest, that would be where I would go, but maybe there is another here.

"Excuse me, miss..." I said to the woman who was still standing as she was before.

"Ruth," she filled in, "Just call me Ruth."

"Lovely to meet you, I am Sara Cunnings," I told her.

"Lovely to meet you Lady Sara. What may I do for you?"

"Well," I started, "I have a question I wish to ask,"

"You may ask, but I can only answer if it is reasonable,"

"In that case, are there any other guests in the castle at the moment?"

"There are the basic court members, miss,"

"Would you happen to know the highest rank of the present court?"

"It is the Duke and Duchess of Dartonson." Married couple. So I would stay on the right side at the top. That helps, but it doesn't completely solve it.

"Are there any single ladies in the court?" I asked this time.

"No, miss,"

"Any other female guests?"

"No, miss." Ruth answered. Then that is my answer.

"Could you take me to the right guest quarters, first door on the top, on the right part of the hall if you please?" I asked.

"Of course, miss," Ruth smiled. I sighed lightly as she took me down the hall and to my room. These halls were as dim as the entrance hall, allowing me to only see the outlines of paintings along with the tables and vases that sat in the hall. There was not much sound, except for one room that had some couple bickering about something that did not interest me in the least. Finally, we stopped at the end of the hall, and turned to the left to find my door. The door opened, and immediately I had to close my eyes at the sudden light that came to me. Once my eyes adjusted, I was able to see all. The room had a fairly high ceiling with a chandelier in the center giving off lots of light to illuminate the light green walls that surrounded me. The room had the basic furniture, including a light blue fainting couch, and some tables and chairs for visitors. There were some paintings of angels and lovers about the walls and a bookcase with a fair amount of books on it.

"Let us get you cleaned up for dinner tonight," Ruth said, stepping into the next room. I followed her to my new bedroom, and had to hold back a gasp.

The room was much like the last one. Light green walls, paintings, various chairs and a cook case, but it was the bed that surprised me. The mattresses reached the normal height of most beds, but the bed posts raised high into the ceiling, which reached at least fifteen feet tall. A ladder stood next to the bed, and it was obviously not well used, for it had no wear on it nor any other sign to prove this. I stood and stared in wonder at the ladder. What in the world would you use a ladder for in here?

"Come on now, miss. The water is still warm, but I can't guarantee it will be for ever," Ruth called to me, breaking my trance. I turned and walked into the lovely pink bathroom which smelled of exotic fruit and sweet flowers. Ruth immediately got me undressed, clean, and into a robe. She was going through the luggage that had been brought to the room for my dress, when I brought up a question that had been on my mind for a while.

"What is the ladder for Ruth?" I could see Ruth turn to me from the corner of my eye as I focused on the ladder.

"It is for a later test miss," she replied.

"How many tests will I be having now?"

"The Queen will tell you later, but you will not be getting much anymore, at least not as much as you have had so far," she told me, "Now, choose one of the gowns," Ruth said. I looked at the closet where she had put all my gowns mixed in with several I had never seen before, probably gifts from the Queen. I looked across the new gowns, knowing that not wearing one tonight would be considered rude. All of them were elegant and some seemed like you could buy a country with just the gown. After much searching I settled on not the loveliest gown, but the only one that seemed suitable for a new guest to wear in the presence of royalty. It was a red one with gold lace to decorate it. The neckline was high and square, which would be considered estimable to someone you have just met. The sleeves were long and flowing, with ties at the top. It had a respectability to it that was perfect for the evening. I grabbed the skirt of it.

"This is the one," I said. Ruth smiled and walked out of the bedroom. I heard the door to the hall open and then heard two loud claps. After a single moment of waiting, my room was bombarded with girls running about with undergarments, brushes, jewelry and all sorts of things. They dragged me around dressing me and primping me, prodding and poking at my hair, and pinching and dabbing at my face until I thought I might die from the excitement in the air. I was used to all of this, of course, but not in such hurry and speed. As the whole commotion was happening, loud bickering filled the room. I did nothing except let the mass of women pull me from place to place, twirling me about, standing me up, and sitting me down.

Finally, when I thought my body couldn't handle any more, the bickering and running about stopped. I found myself in front of a mirror with a crowd of servants standing about me with eager and expectant expressions. I looked in the mirror and smiled. I had fine natural beauty, my blue eyes always showing against my brown hair and rosy cheeks and lips. I had also always been one to have a good result after preparations by the maids. However, right now, in front of the mirror, it seemed like the maids had transformed me into a living work of art. The dress fit me well, supporting my curves while keeping me respectable. The red of the dress went well with my complexion and contrasted well with my blue eyes. All of my hair was put up in a simple twist, only a single wave of hair hung down the back of my neck. I turned to the others and nodded my head with a smile.

"Thank you all so much. It's wonderful," I responded. The girls called out victoriously, clapping their hands and jumping about. This time, they caught the mildly exasperated expression on my face and calmed down, curtsying lightly. Ruth stepped forward then.

"Miss, they will be expecting you by now," she informed me with a nod.

"Of course I answered," I replied and then added, "I suppose I must find the dining hall myself then. Ruth nodded. I sighed lightly and made my way out of the room. I then turned down the silent hall and turned to my right, understanding the symmetry of the castle well enough to find my destination. It was not long until I hit the room that was filled with talking and gossip. I was eager to go in and join the talkative group, but was maintained my pace. I turned in to the hall and told my name to the herald.

"Lady Sara Brina Cunnings," the herald announced. I then stepped forward until I was at the right spot, turned to the Queen and performed the low curtsy necessary in the presence of the court. I short time required for my head to be bowed, and looked up to the Queen, whose face seemed quite ashen. At first, she seemed to look angry at me, but then she smiled.

I thought she would motion for me to rise, but she just smiled mischievously as I had to stay in my low curtsy. Was this another test? At first I thought it was, but when I heard the light confused mumbling from the crowd and saw the spite in the Queen's eyes, I knew the Queen was simply torturing me. Perhaps she was angry I had made it this far through her tests, not many ladies would return to say they made it this far, and some of those who did were obviously lying to make them appear good. Then again, why in the world would she try ladies so hard? No one is perfect. And certainly no one would do _this_ in the everyday life of a lady. I had been resisting the urge to fall down from the pain of the position, my legs just barely shaking despite my will to keep steady. I held strong though. I would not let my family down by being sent home for something so silly as not being able to curtsy long enough. I did not just worry of my family, but of my country. Nossel needed help. Many were struggling from the lack of leadership from a ruler. Our Queen certainly was not doing much. My legs burned and soon my hands joined from holding the skirt up. Despite the pain that this was putting me through, I kept my appearance calm. I wouldn't let my pain show, I wouldn't let her majesty break me. I took a deep breath to relax me, but that got me off balance and I almost tumbled. There was a small gasp from the crowd, and then a sigh of relief as I held my stance. As a result of this though, my position became more strained and my pain began to creep onto my face. I won't give up. My legs began to tremble more fiercely. I won't give up. My knees started to give way. I won't give up. I closed my eyes for a short moment and winced as the pain became unbearable.

"Mother stop!"

* * *

A/N: Yes. I know. I know. It is a bit of a cliffie, but it's not toooo bad! Anyway. What's gonna happen? I think we all know, but do you really know? Do you? Hehehehehhehee. Oh, and just letting you know (if you haven't figured ti out already), all the stuff about castles and stuff is all stuff I pulled out of my buttocks, so if you happen to be doing a report or something on castles or something and saw this and went "hmm... interesting" don't be deceived! This is fiction and therefore this is a fictional castle!

**Miss Piratess:** Yeah. I do like the whole "girl-power" stuff, but I get confused with the fact that each of these girls acts like they are the only spunky girl in the world and yet there are THOUSANDS of these stories of "girl-power" girls, so technically, they are not alone. Also, why is everyone so against the ladies? Well, I guess because they are melodramatic jerks, but why are the ladies always melodramatic jerks? Last time I checked, ladies are supposed to be calm, collected, and at least a bit kind. So that is why I decided to write this. Sara is just as spirited as the rest isn't she? So there to all those girls who think being a lady is as bad as sitting on a fire. Humph. Sorry, got a little caught up in that. Thank you for the review!

**Lulai:** hehehehe. I want a cookie too! Give me the cookie! What cookie you ask? The cookie that has "So... much ... goodness" that's what! Hehehehe. Thank you for your review. It made me dance a bit, and then it made me go get a cookie! Hehehe.

**Dreamer at heart:** I DO HAVE STORIES RUNNING ABOUT IN MY HEAD SCREAMING! AND IT HURTS LIKE NOBODY KNOWS (except for those who _also_ have stories running about in their heads screaming). Muahahahahhahahahahahaahaha! Oh... sorry... went temporarily (well, technically I'm ALWAYS like this) insane there. Thank you for the review!

Much ladylikeness,

Mia


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